It amazes me just how many people have been so deeply touched by Robin Williams’ death. My facebook page has been inundated with comments because I posted this short message: “So sad, so sad, so sad. Depression is an awful illness from which more of us than admit, suffer. Suicide is tragic for families, but it is NOT an easy way out. Neither is it a selfish act. It is often the action of someone who simply cannot tolerate the emotional pain anymore or bear the thought of being a burden to their families. Depression is an ILLNESS! Suicide is often a result of that illness.”
There is a big difference between feeling sad and down and suffering from clinical depression. I don’t want to describe how it feels or what might lead someone into thinking that death is a logical, practical solution. I doubt that many suicides are carried out in fits of rage. Rather, they are quiet affairs, prepared for and carefully thought through.
One thing I do know is that a suicidal person feels detached from the world and from the people they love. They feel ashamed of the depression as it sets them apart, makes them feel like failures, destroys self-esteem, keeps them in that dark place where every slight, every rejection is amplified to screaming.
There is still such a HUGE stigma attached to suffering from depression. Please world, wake up to the fact that sometimes, all a person needs is love and understanding and no judgement. It won’t cure the depression, but it does make a moment of difference; it does light a spark on an otherwise blackened, hopeless horizon. It is so very hard on families and they need love too. There is nothing more painful than watching someone you love and admire fade away, be torn apart mentally by the furies, inwardly seared with sorrow until they disappear into a void where they can no longer be reached.
Please, let’s be aware of mental illness and give it the same compassion and understanding as any other illness.
I was surprised to find out how fond I am of Mr. Williams…I have been thinking about him quite a lot. When I get the opportunity, I want to be brave enough to offer a simple question, “What is it like to be you?” and really strive to listen with my heart open.
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It has really been playing on my mind, Priscilla. There really is so much ignorance about mental illness. Bless you!
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I liked your post because it describes the way I feel when depression sneaks up on me..luckily blogging and writing have helped (along with an understanding husband) to stave it off. For me it was like being swallowed by a black hole, where events happened around you but you had no part in them and the light of hope was hidden out of reach.
Your last line sums up the message beautifully, compassion and understanding are the only way forward.
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Thank you for stopping by and leaving your comment. My heartfelt greetings go out to you and yes! writing is a godsend.
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So very well put my dear. Blessings to you.
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Thank you, Darlene for stopping by. There really is not enough understanding of mental illness and I hope dear Robin’s death will help to highlight this issue.
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This is an outstanding post Niamh. I am so glad you emphasized that it is “not an easy way out or a self act.” It is a deep pain that is hard for many to understand. But, I do believe we shouldn’t judge or make assumptions about what was going on for Robin. I hope it brings depression into the light and helps others. I hope the worldwide conversation continues.
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Thank you so much Patricia for your continued support of my blog. Robin’s death has been so on mind that such a talented, brilliant, well-loved person can have been so ravaged by such an awful illness.
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Beautiful post, Niamh. So true. Depression is not the same as being in a blue flunk. I was amazed by how much his death affected me too. First I was stunned and then I had this overwhelming sadness. I hope Robin can feel our love.
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I hope so too, J.P. as I hope all those who suffer from Depression will feel an outpouring of recognition for their often stigmatised illness.
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I had occasion earlier in the week to correct someone who referred to Robin Williams as selfish and taking the cowards way out. We both know this could not be further from the truth and yet it’s such a common misconception.
Few people understand that the person who commits suicide often does so thinking they’re doing their partner, their family and the world at large a favour by doing this. The feelings of self-hate, inadequacy and worthlessness are strong enough to blind one to any talk of love.
I hope he’s found peace now and that his family understand it may have been his biggest act of love towards them albeit wrong.
xxx Massive Hugs Niamh xxx
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Indeed, David. Thank you for your great comments. xxx
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I treat very often patients with severe depression..they come to me for ECT…Electro Convulsive Therapy..under anaesthesia..most of them fully recover…recently, I was playing Volleyball some players..suddenly I realized that the guy playing with me was my old patient of ECT.
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Thank you for your comment, Dr. Pendyala. How does it work?
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Beautiful post and tribute. I think he is on all our minds .He certainly has been on mine, I too was surprised by how sad I felt on hearing his death.
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Hi Patientdreamer…It’s just so shocking to see someone so talented and brilliant be swallowed up like that. We really are so vulnerable. Thank you for stopping by.
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Did you watch the movie ” Beautiful Mind ” ..Professor Nash, was suffering from delusions and depression and he is shown being administered Elecro convulsive therapy…ECT…the exact mechanism is not well understood..how it works..but the idea is to give convulsions to the patient..either by hypogycemia..by giving Insulin as shown in the movie..or by giving electric shocks to the brain
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I am sure, most of you must have watched the movie A Beautiful Mind released in 2001 an American biographical drama film based on the life of John Nash, a Nobel Laureate in Economics. Although being a genius, he was suffering from Depression and recurrent delusions and hallucinations. He was shown being treated with Insulin Shock therapy…also known as ECT. Myself being an Anaesthesiologist regularly give ECT shocks to depressed patients who are resistant to normal medicines for depression. We give anaesthesia to make it safe and comfortable to the patient while producing the convulsions by giving mild electric shocks to the patient’s brain. Believe it or not, it works..and the clear mechanism is not understood till date, how it works.
The other day, I was playing Volleyball and was pleasantly surprised to find one of my ECT patient enjoying the game and playing Volleyball in the opposite team.
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PS. Needless to say, I wrote this post to educate people on Depression after recent celebrity death of Oscar winning Robin Williams allegedly by suicide due to depression.
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I love your tribute to Robin Williams! The man was a genius in every way and learning of his death was one of those moments that will stay in my mind forever. A friend of mine also wrote a blog as a tribute to his passing and an attempt to raise awareness to the insidious nature of depression and the difference that those around the sufferer can make. You might like to have a read at http://www.bitchescoz.blogspot.com.au/2014/08/make-em-laugh-respect-love-condolences.html
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As a former counseling social worker who worked with many suffering from depression, and an almost lifelong sufferer of depression myself, the death of Robin Williams really touched a nerve. He never failed to bring out a laugh in me, and I know just how precious those laughs and good times are in life.
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Thank you gajohnson…I agree, small, precious moments are so precious Thank you for stopping by.
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